heavyweight choose(s)

“A música venceu” - It‘s true!

With this samba-enredo, João Carlos Martins’ life was sang by Vai Vai Samba School and they won the São Paulo’s parade carnival this year. One of the most noted contemporary musicians of erudite, he was honoured by a big fancy show at this carnival time.

This pianoman and maestro, well-known by his acclaimed (Johann Sebastian) Bach performances, had his life presented on the avenue cadenced by Bateria’s beats played by hundreds of rhythmers on Friday, 04th. For those who don’t know, This man is a live example of overcoming.

He have had great difficulties during his career. Firstly, since he had lost his right-hand movements due to an accident during a soccer match, he became a maestro. Just as he had rehabilitated his capacity to play again, he developed a illness that made him give up of music.

However, his passion was stronger and he passed to play only with the left hand, creating an unique style. After a concert in Sofia, Bulgaria, he was robbed and took a licking, losing the movements again. So, after a dream, he decided to learn to conduct and, finally, became a maestro. Nowadays, he is world-widely recognized.

Interesting, because life’s journey can be as a symphony with its acts: allegro, andante, adagio and largo. Life has its ups and downs. It is important keep going on, though.

once a king, always a king

Another triumph of music was the Beija-Flor's parade, in Rio de Janeiro, on Monday 7th (better: on the early morning of Tuesday).  Presenting Roberto Carlos's life, they won this year the dispute.

As João Carlos, Roberto is another example of overcoming. Many people don't know, but he lost one of his legs when he was a child. It was an accident, a locomotive runned over him. Nevertheless, he continued his life quite fine and reached the peak of acclaim and has been decorated as a ’king’ (of MPB, and also youth in 60’s, and since 2010, of Latin Music).

His groupies (at any age - from childhood through the old age - nevertheless, the majority aren't little girls anymore...) are always shouting, frenetic. His fan legion was awaiting anxiously for that moment of glory. Now, they are satisfied - many have held fast with them the red rose given (a tacky cliché that still works with this audience).

This year, Vai Vai and Beija Flor were succeded while choosing two men of renown (and also blessed) -as the noble motif (or theme) for their carnival parade. Both São Paulo e Rio have homaged our music, which won anyway, indeed!

Bravo.

not good as his bad words

ONCE UPON A TIME in our History a period when signatures were not necessary, only a simple word was enough to believe in somebody. Well… It happened, a long time ago(!), though.

Nowadays, NOBODY should do agreements without be full sure of who is the other person with who is doing it. In detail: the signature is fundamental. That is to say that our WORD doesn’t worth so much anymore (almost nothing, indeed). 

Surreal this… We simply CAN’T trust in which people say, only in their acts: what they sign on (or proof in another way that is true). Not even in which some individuals write they will do it is secured anymore...

Not so far, in my time, a word given was a fulfilled word (even by mouth). Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like this anymore… Even so, in my opinion, someone who does not keep its words doesn’t deserve any respect.

So, finally, when and in whom we can trust? I REALLY don’t know.

Lately, people are not what they say, but what they do. However, they are unpredictable. Honour is something that many of them don't care about. It "simply" doesn't matter anymore... UNBELIEVABLE!

[Oh, God!]

annoyances

 Maybe it was merely coincidence, nevertheless was so intense that I’ve wondered myself about which reason made it happens to me.

Firstly, was a frustrating disregard with my professional dedication, then, a incredible irresponsibility even working (or pretending to) for a both interesting and important job. Not enough, was an injudiciousness and a stab on my back from who I provided some status, besides put inside my circle of friends. Finally, a default due to a lack of character, not at work at this time but worst: chez moi.

Many 'miss'es along the way… Now, as a result I have another one: I miss good people around me, my real friends. They are the best medicine to heal (and forget) these bad things that haunt me.

for good reasons

I really believe that nothing is by chance. EVERYTHING happens due to something bigger.

Today I Know why I’m giving one step behind, coming back to my origins - something doubtfull couples day before - Crazy! (a difficult decision, but necessary….) I should be there, helping someone, giving it force - and I will.

I’m not going to complain about. It’s noble my purpose. I have a mission, tidying the house, come back a little to go ahead far far away…(!)

all kisses I haven’t given, all hugs I haven’t received

If I've regretted something, it is a kind of caress that I haven’t demonstrated and, at heart, I indeed would like to. Being more affectionate, apart from evince my feelings and real desires is an exercise that I need to practice further. In fact, it is essential to play fair in this life not to lament later.

Saying “I love you” (not only in couple's relationships, but) at home more often, thanking my mother all kindness and attention she have had with us (my sister and me), holding my friends and saying how much they are important for me… It is the best proof of my endearment. Nevertheless, sometimes, it is not necessary say anything, because our acts speak for itself.

Then, I really believe in the power of touch. I think that, sometimes, we simply forget to be closer, hugging, for example (at least for a few minutes) who is important for us. This is vital, though. Once, I advised a cousin to do this with my uncle when he was very sick. I’m sure that, before dieing, he could enjoy the fraternal fondling of his son.

This is my main worry about living in another country where people’s behaviour is not as ours. I fear miss the human warmth proper of Latins (chiefly of partners - lover men). However, I should be honest that I’m not easy and I usually pretend to hold out. My self-sufficiency is like I shoot myself in my own foot. It have made me being seen as a little selfish, indifferent or far worse: sexually cold! [Dammit!] Similarly, being needy and dedicate myself to someone who doesn’t deserve it - but it is another story, outro (con)texto…(!)

Both cases are mistakes that I’m not interested to repeat anymore. I want (an)other(s) chance(s). I promise that the cold weather is not going to changed me into an iced-cube heart person - here (nor there). It can be different...

pronto!

In a country on the top of most part of research about worldwide spent of time online, where, likewise, each one person has one mobile, its people prefer to have a television than a bathroom at home! No, I‘m NOT joking, it IS true! This place (not to say 'planet') exists and it is not distant…

Believe it or not, these data are ascribed to Brazil! In my unusual moment right now, even being a Brazilian citizen, I’m thwarting these statistics. Being (almost) incommunicable, I’m a complete E.T. nowadays!

Without both TV and cell phone, if I have not my neighbour’s (free) internet either (God, thanks I can take and use it!), I would be lost… or, “better”, I would be a LOOSER for the present youth patterns. 

Because of this behaviour, we are suffering of connectivity's stress - the need to be online fulltime (among other things). Not only this, but it takes money… and who is paying this bill? (here, in addition, unfortunately, everything related of communication is still very expensive!)

Well, I'm paying through my nose for the changes I'm living now.

something unless?

Well, It has been so strange live without television’s "presence" at home…

It is only a matter of time until I take mine back. Before, on the contrary, it was not my decision (inclusively and MAINLY the channel to watch it!). Equally House (of course!), I miss in particular the possibility to watch my movies on DVD.  

It seems like I am wasting my time doing nothing, alone. Nevertheless, I’m using this “free time” to bring up to date blog’s texts that I had written but I couldn't post until now due to technical problems.

I've never been away so long, or a mula nunca ficou tanto tempo sem rugir…(I always play upon words with the blog‘s name, in Portuguese indeed, because doesn’t make any sense in English) However, at this right moment, I’m at the peak of my glory - of writing my posts in English!

My ‘comps’ is my best present company in addition to the internet being something more powerful than the television was someday. Owing to this, I shouldn't miss it and enjoy this season with something unless (? - No, I don't think so...). 

nothing to lose

As soon as possible, when I will have just finished to up date this blog, I am going to be some kind of monster to these (online) days: I‘ll set aside the internet in my daily life as much as I can to giving a deep dive into some books I want to read. Another hobby I’m going to dedicate myself acutely is going to the cinema more often.

Accessing it everyday, a long period during all the day long, is practically impossible to enjoy these other arts as I’m decided to do. I want to take a cultural shower from these sources. Therefore, it’s necessary give a limit to this new media as mothers did in the past with children who used to stay many hours in front of television…

Books - all the best! (in any time, for everybody…) No restrictions, no waste of time.

moments

It says that at 6pm is the angels' time. So, I’m always trying to pay attention in everything which happens exactly at this rush hour.

Often (unfortunately) some problems suddenly emerge in the end of the working hours not only to keep us until later at office, but to proof our capacity to solve it, mastering the difficulties and, finally, have this corner turned.

On the other hand, it is the perfect occasion to receive some call and invitation. It is almost night and the deadline to do something special is not over yet.

A resolution opportunity... Give your good luck a chance!

lent

Started yesterday the time of changing. It is a 40 days period for everybody lead their lives to the best way. However, it doesn’t means merely do the right choices into a purification. It’s necessary to dedicate their lives entirely and understand its full reason - their vocation, incumbence and also their missionary’s field of action.

I recognize both my responsabilities and the essential effort to achieve my goals. Thus, my future is being defined right now. Although everything has happened to frustrate my plans, all my losses, I wish nobody ill… only justice(!), and health - for me, to take all I owned back (actually, even more… new captures!).

Nothing is by chance. Let’s go ahead and wait for…

enough is enough

I’m tired… Being a good person is not a good choice, after all, we always got our fingers burnt!

Owing to people respect more who doesn’t worth nor what is eaten - It happens professionally and in relationships, it is NOT a good market INDEED. Furthermore, men don’t prefer princesses, but bitches! 

So, why am I butting my head against a wall, insisting to be a looser?  Not anymore [please!].

I'm inclusively reading a Sherry Argov's book/manual to help myself to be worse… ops(!) “better”! It is necessary to be attended nowadays when the values have changed.

Further: good girls go to haven, the bad ones go to Amsterdam!

Thus... 'doei'!

me and myself

It’s sad to know that some people have the wrong idea of who we really are. Nevertheless, It’s happen… Further, all the worse is the sure that they are announcing to the four winds that you are in a role which IS NOT your (at least not in this life!).

Professional is about work, while personal is everything done at home. What is the difference between both? “None” (for them). This lack is an excuse to justify their bad character. It is something as a shooting in their own foot.

Although I don’t like to be on the others mouth, I don’t care a straw indeed. In fact, I’m not worried about that. The importance we have is measured by the worth which other people give us. So, I can say pround I’m powerfull because I’m at peak - almost being a celebrity - unless the tone of the comments.

I know who I am (and I am not), and who matters knows aswell (and put me on the top - the same way I do, because we love and support each other). We are truthful friends and of these relationships became our real importance.

So, I’m a wonderful person, while my ‘enemies’ are not. After all, I haven't given them this power indeed! Poor people who need to turning to an inadequate behaviour to get some merit [?] - bad choice...!

dreary season

No men as angels, super heros, Roman imperators, Grecian gods, policemen, fake Jesus, rock stars, crossdressers (as White Snow, - my favorite one!), European princes or soccer players, nor the foreign tourists (even the dutch ones) can cheer up me.

All my plans were transferred, procrastinated… I runned a lot to do everything in a correct way and, now, I simply don't know what should I do. My mind, my thoughts, my will are not here yet. I’m just waiting my soul reach me back.
 
I can't do anything against it, apart from try to keep going ahead... in spite of being difficult, almost impossible react at this moment, right now! I've suffered quietly not to be boring for the others who don‘t deserve this sorrowful energy.

Astonished (in the worst term), I simply can’t pretend to be happy celebrating a festivity that I wouldn’t like to witness it! I'm sad, still aghast at so much bad luck, crookedness… I deplore this situation and just wish leave it behind.

My life wasn’t to be like this right now, but it is, though… terrified by pirates, robbers, rogues, swindlers, scoundrels, vagrants… ops! Are there costumes for these last? Well, firstly something derived from ‘rock’, then a jew next to a martial arts pretender boy, and finally an ogre. This is a freak show! - not a reason to be joyful, glad and light-hearted, unfortunately.

March waters

It rains more than enough and everything I want is staying at home, resting quite tranquil, recharging my batteries… That this have a good cry  (in Portuguese: lavem minha alma! - necessary). 

Thus, “São as águas de março fechando o verão, é promessa de vida no meu coração”.
(a classic verses of Tom Jobim through Elis' voice that represent this moment)

When will begin the next season, PLEASE? (I'm awaiting anxious!)  

vai, vai

 

I’m trying(!), but all the parades seems so crowded, so confused… This event's structure in Rio is not still enough - at least for me: a boring adult who takes a dim view of having to pee on the streets, or look desperate for some (dirty) toilet… (*I avoid the port-a-potty ones - I simply CAN'T - sorry!).

Furthermore, my mind is not still here. I admit that I left my heart and my thoughts there, in the other side of Atlantic Ocean… I’m here just by (bad) chance… Unfortunately. Even the festivities are not going to make me feel like carnival. Although is good some kind of fun to take me off this frustration, I guess I wont enjoy so much at this time.

It’s my (unhappy) period… Everybody has yours(!). 

"la ra rara, la ra rara... la ra rara, rara"

eco pee

Using to advantage that peeing "is in fashion" here right now...

I saw this idea/project/proposal to peeing while taking shower and I have decided to support the campaign. Actually, I've been done that a long time... It wont be a new action for me.

Sorry to the men who, although they always do it standed in front of the toilet, don't understand us about relaxing completly under the water (since you heard the sound of water falling). Therefore, I really disagree that it is quite nasty.

Besides its eco purposes (known from now), I'm sure that drunk people also do that, but as a consequence of another need... After all, it's necessary.

no rose without thorns

It says that women prefer thug guys…

I’m not going to say that it is a lie, because we simply don’t like so much honey in men’s behaviour. In fact, ladies deserve attention,.. We like and appreciate to be  pampered, but our partners can’t be TOO sweet - It drives us annoyed and bored, besides leaves us tired of them.

Although it happens often, we know that we should deal with it differently. However, it is stronger than us and, sometimes, we look for some trouble (with the wrong rude men). Only when we wake up for the reality and realize which one is the best choice, we are going to figure out an easier and satisfying relationship and, finally, face it.

Perfection simply doesn’t exist, but a mix of kindness and robustness as some kind of protection works quite finely. Experimenting the gall of being alone or in bad companies makes us miss a lot the best men’s properties. Then, we regretted not being (in love) with the gentle ones, giving them their real worth. This is a crucial instant.

Thus...   (I’ll use the poet’s words to describe what succeeded as a consequence:)

“Veio o amor, como um abraço curto, pra não sufocar…” - Cazuza.

Deus mais tem pra dar que o diabo pra tirar

God forbid! I know that He is not one to be mocked, but it is true!

I believe. He had planned it so… He always proves us His grace even working in His mysterious ways.

God helps those who help themselves, besides had rained manna. His mills grind slowly...

Thank God! You’re my trust.

(un)known by the companies who keeps

People - difficult to know who they REALLY are… It happens: you can sleep, work and play with the enemy and simply don't know about that!

It is a dream when a "buddy" surprises us showing his good qualities, how much trustworthy and friendly he is. However, sometimes, we live a type of nightmare because we trust in who isn’t exactly who pretend to (and SHOULD) be.

Usually, they show some tips of their real personality through the expression of their eyes… When you don’t feel good energy from it, you can question yourself about this citizen. Try to believe in your intuition. In most cases it tell us the truth.

Actually, doesn’t work asking for references... (mainly if you chose not the best alternative to do that - who is just a blummer aswell!). Other people just don’t say the same truth that the look and your feelings will warning you about. To make matters worse, people lie, cheat and mislead, while another (like me) are the dupe of someone! Oh, I wish I knew... Now, It is better to laugh, so I don't cry...!

Hence, we grown up and are not so green as we were before. Live and learn… (and from our mistakes is a consequence). Nevertheless, I don’t believe that is better being a roguish than a good person. I prefer being a sensible one.     

As a rule, what goes around, comes around... Everything we do here, come back in equally force or still more intensive for us later! The evil that men do lives after them. Simple like that: You reap what you sow. Thus, safely, I feel hope for my future... Fortunately, I'm not a scoundrel, nor a stumbling rock on the no one's way (or inside their shoes)!

quem nasceu pra tico tico nunca chega a sabiá

On trust.

Then, I breathed a sigh of relief... Fortunately, I have several friends who I could borrow money if it was necessary.

Seems silly, but I believe being a trustworthy person extremely important. Thus, I'm so pround and satisfied by myself because I realized that I got this credit.

It is so rewarding when people trust in us! This proofs that we are esteemed, not only loved by many but chiefly respected. 

This is a wonderful inference (mine - of course…). It is a personal merit, conquered on long term. Unfortunate is who doesn’t have this good luck (just not to say ‘capacity‘), besides not deserving it. 

coming back

Fallen out of the course, without an exact route to go ahead... 

Sometimes, we will understand the real need to be like that only after has past some time, in its season... in due course. Whether this is good or not, I don't know right now. However, I am conscious of it is really necessary.
   
I am so sorry to had left this my personal project… Despite to had set aside my skill to write and show my point of view about many things that are happening around me for a long period, now is time to restart - again and over! This excites me to go on, hard-set.

For sure: a small step back now leading me to two steps forward later!

more than words

“Melhor que o livro em si, são as suas dedicatórias” - Yes, I hit the nail on the head! Wow... Actually, I already knew that… ('cause I think the same way!) So...

On the first page, something like that:

Ik ben eindelijk iemand tegen gekomen voor wie dat boek echt logisch is. Vertel me later hoe de reis was! Liefs.

It’s just my (best) way to say ‘Thank you’, and the rest... well, is everything that I have taken with me, and is still here… (I always knew that I will feel something special) This kind of sentiment is difficult to change inside us, besides, it just happens - "unintentionally" and with "no" reason and intention to be bad, or harmful for anybody!

About the book (and not the affection), it is true: for the first time in my life I gave it for the correct person. Nevertheless, it was (better: IS!) more than a simple (another "Budhist") gift…

I believe that both this philosophy and the proposed inquiry of values come in a good occasion, aswell the challenge of being zen(ner) is wonderful - and necessary, inclusively! A reflection about our lives, how we are conducting it by our acts and thoughts is vital! Moreover, it also helps us to be a better person.

It was just a friendly kindness, but could be (even) more… maybe a Thai massage, with whole feminine vanity and everything else! At any rate, I hope it works! After all, I’m constant.

At the right time, I will write about this incredible trip. Await!

*(So do I… written words - in the old school way of course ;)

desires, memories and melancholy

I would like to go upstairs and see all the city (or a large part of) through its roofs. I always think about that, the landscape and thoughts by this point of view… the outlooks.  It's a possibility to get a breath of fresh air (and equally old and historical). “Telhados de Paris”, a Nei Lisboa’s song outlines some idea about that. 

So, when I saw the ‘Blue Roofs’, a Picasso’s painting, in Van Gogh Museum (Picasso in Paris 1900-1907 exhibition – until May there), this intention was brought to the light, more than ever. It results in a fantasy... It's a real illusion, only mine. When I was there, in Paris, last year, I simply didn't realize that I could put into practice this dream. However I asked for, in Amsterdam (in vain...) Silly girl...

                                                          

(nem tudo azul)

Sometimes, the unpreparedness leads us to this way… Changing the subject, I remembered, both seeing that shadowy images from his melancholy Blue Period and reading about its stories, the Broadway musical ‘Spring Awakening’, an rock adaptation of the controversial 1891 German play of the same title.

Carlos Casagemas, a Spanish painter aswell, moved to Paris in the same period of his friend, Picasso. In 1901, he killed himself with a shot in the head when he was only 21 years old as a consequence of an unanswered love. This unsuccessful affair drove him crazy (literally).

Notably, the beginning of 18th century was distinguished by this youth behavior. Their immaturity gave rise to some unhappiness which brought about these damages to the society of that period. In the teen ages being as an infant and after that, immediately becoming a mister… with all responsabilities and the burden of it on their back. It used to be too severe for everyone.

                                                         

Museums – a cultural trip around important subjects of our History. I really appreciate it!

Picasso in Paris 1900-1907 exhibition

18 February - 29 May 2011

Van Gogh Museum

Museumplein - Paulus Potterstraat 7 

Daily from 10am to 6pm

Adults: € 14
0-17 years: free (a valid ID may be requested)

*My tip is going on Friday Nights – in these occasions the museum in open until 10pm.

Besides the free guided tours around the exhibition (and also for the permanent one - unlosable!) – in English and Dutch, there is always something special going on: lounge chairs, video projections, live music, DJs and a bar to relax and enjoy it even more (better if in a special company - of course!).

graced

I’m blessed.

In fact, I always knew that it will snow!

For me, it is a kind of gift - special one.

Despite of being pretty cold and the slipping floor makes me almost miss one’s footing, I simply don’t care. I’m amazed.

It’s a marvellous grace.

not completely

In spite of being frustrated because I haven’t saw the lakes totally frozen (and still haven't ice skated on them, inclusively!), I’m quite satisfied. I have felt in these last days the nature power through its transformation of this season and its preparation for the next one.

It’s a magic process.

I’m sure that will be integrally done next time - not only about that... At last, it's something more complexed than the ducks habitat - unfortunately, did by halves yet.

Next cicle (time/round): I'm ready for it!

holy grazing TV

I’m going to write this post in Portuguese due to my indignation and frustration.

Eu venho lá do Brasil para chegar aqui na Europa e assistir TV na minha língua? Na boa, preferia estar treinando o meu inglês, vendo a programação internacional - afinal, são uns 300 canais! Mas não… Dia e noite é só sermão de pastor, programas de baixa qualidade (infelizmente, porque dá para ver que o investimento é grande) e produtos de uma imprensa marrom: SÓ DESGRAÇA!

Essa é a Record Internacional - presente fulltime na minha vida atual.

Reclamo MUITO enquanto assisto! Chego a ser chata, admito. Mas é impossível ser diferente diante o que vejo. Não estudei para ficar vendo merda. Não consigo. Fico triste em vivenciar uma substimação e degradação da capacidade intelectual do público espectador brasileiro que mora no exterior. E isso nada tem a ver com crenças religiosas.

Poderia ser melhor (vi que posso inclusive trabalhar para eles sem problemas algum! Nada do que eles fazem é estranho ou difícil a mim), mas não é. Estando for a, o quadro fica ainda pior porque o nível das propagandas e dos programas gringos, por exemplo, é infinitamente superior ao nosso. Tenho tentado subverter o “sistema” instaurado onde eu moro, para ver uma programação digna.

Mas o pior: eles gostam! - sem se questionar sobre o que assistem diariamente.

A mula ruge… os burros, não (forte, mas é verdade!).

¡olè!

Josep Guardiola - my new excuse (ops! REASON) to watch the Barça games from now on.

Stupid! I found with almost one month delayed the best place for a Happy Hour on Wednesday... (*Dank je wel, Rafatje!)

As of now, my best programming for these nights will be going to a European typical Pub to watch the games of Champions League on television. Actually, doesn’t matter the teams which are be playing. Whichever game it will be passing on TV, will be interesting due to the masculine  (en mooi) audience.

Perfect: I like both football and going out, as well as drink some beer and see people… but mainly to KNOW the new ones. It will be a good opportunity to make (boy)friends - Spanish, English, Italian, and why not also Dutch? I’m not xenophobic at all…  

no-hair-heads driving me crazy

I should be honest… Here, in Europe, most part of guys that attract me is bald.

Nothing against the blond hair of who has it… nor the rood ones (Indeed, I like it!. However, it has just happened often!). I’ve met lots of Bens and Bruces… and now, I discovered him: Guardiola, my bald momentary icon - who used to be brunette ,  contradicting my european statistics - but I simply don't care about that!

¡olè! 

strict european way of life

Next month, or in a week’s time - It is when Dutch people can see you again and book a meeting, dinner, to have a drink or whatever! From now until their schedule has finished (all appointments booked before this exact moment), it wont be possible being included in their lives.

Perhaps this happens because they were not awaiting for this new situation. However, if today their programming was looking for it (dating someone, for example), probably they’ll put you as a priority in their agenda. A typical rational European behaviour…

It’s so strange for us, latins, who, alternatively, when meet somebody (special) change the plans ever since. As soon as possible, we are going to invite this person to take part of our lives’ programming - if be worthwhile, of course! Ah, if it were as simple as that with them too... I think they may be happier, to be astounded more naturally and could laugh a whole lot more of life's surprisings, or, at least, take things easy (to others - more flexible, like me...)!

Finally, we are REALLY more easygoing… not only this, but also emotional (then, I admit that I enjoy this our way of being). I swear that I wont to fuck only on the day set, or have to schedule (at least) 'this'! [PLEASE...!] I just want to change my mind according to the events, people and anything else that happens in my life (besides someone who thinks on his feet and  juggles to be with me, by my side).

winter environment

- Look there! What are those black points on the water?

“Ducks!”, he answered me smiling… So I looked at them again, very impressed by their facility in stay at the same place, fluctuating, even with the gale which had wind-bounded us, letting everybody when in the wind‘s eyes almost without can walk many times during the better part of a day (and night).

Indeed, I could never imagine that I would find many animals so close where I’m living… I always thought that in Europe everything related to nature (the weather and its creatures inclusively!) were a little grey and dead… Well, I was completely wrong!

Everyday, when I go out home I see on the grassy spaces between the buildings in my neighbourhood some small groups of hares. Furthermore, uncountable species of ducks... green, black and white ones, besides other waterfowls - in most part of them, are adorning the cold landscape. 

In contrast of many cockroachs, rats, pigeons and bats that I was used to find near my house in Rio, here, in Amsterdam, I've seen flights of sea-gulls, storks, herons, gooses, and also flocks of tropical cocotas. Increadible! - I'm really surprised about that in particular due to the adverse weather... 

(*Ok, I know that there are many species of beautiful animals inhabiting Rio. However, in Laranjeiras is not common see crocodiles, fishs, many monkeys and birds! In different places, maybe you can meet them easily, but not there...)

as teddy-bears

Another type of animal we can meet often here, in the North Europe, is a kind of domestic bear. Actually, this low-temperature season usually results in people's behaviour changes (we practically became it!) - almost hibernating... sleeping and eating a lot (besides sometimes wearing heavy furry clothes). As the teddy ones, we rest on the bed most part of time (that we can!).

On the other hand, there is always someone 'bearlike', who is changed into a gruff person as a consequence of having its heart freezed - of course, this last one, isn’t my case INDEED.

too bad to be true

Could be the saints people from the evil?

Well, it’s a theory. Actually, nothing is ‘IMPOSSIBLE’… and (as someone that I know used to say…) nothing is also too extreme! However, I (and it’s my OWN opinion) don’t think so.

Perhaps It could be something cultural for me,more than religious itself. My family always worship them. I grew up going to different churches and believing that they can help us. In particular, Anthony Saint, whose name my uncles have as their second names.

Secondly, it is Saint Teresa, and the 'Terezinha' of my mother isn’t at random. It used to be a Conti’s tradition. Fortunately, my mother decided to finish with this custom. Thus, me and my sister were free of this interesting composition in our names.

Moreover, I’ve had lots of proofs that they are good - or were… when they lived - doesn’t matter! I believe that since they have done goodness around the world, they were God’s agents sent to be here, with us, proclaiming His words.

Since they used to live in accordance with it, I don’t believe they could be bad… Ok, they were not as Jesus was, but were also important with their graces. The devil simply doesn’t have all this power and good will. For sure, his envoys are others…

the bright side of everything

Sunny days - I can use only one of my hands to count them with my fingers… Even so, it is going to be left over!

Now I begin to understand the depression of North European people, who feels only few times not only the sun energy, but also the power of the its rays.

I admit that I usually try to chose the sunny walkside to go on the dutch kanaals. It’s important for me receive a little of this to get some energy, at least. Habituated with it, Brazilians (like me) miss the usual sunshowers on the beach. 

Probably, the cold mood of these people might change when is summer and the wheater is warmer... I guess.

Another curious (and tiring) matter is that the days are very short here. Only From 8 to 5pm is bright day - when the sun appears, of course. As a consequence, 3pm is already (unfortunately) the end of the afternoon!

Many business are closed (or ‘gesloten’ - as could be seen when someone tries to go somewhere after 17h) so early. It is different for us, who in Brazil are used to find many places open until 20h, or later - until the last costumer.

This is the European way of life: relaxing time after lunch, shops, drugstores and supermarkets closed at 6 pm (or five minutes before, just to guarantee no one working more than is agreed!). Fair!

a good market

Euro Shopper - my new dutch friend!

It’s a special Albert Keijn brand which sales more for less… by low prices - actually, the best ones. Similar to Qualitá, in Rio, that belongs to Pão de Açúcar Group, is as well as cheaper than the others. 

Now, although I just moved from Rio to Amsterdam, my household skills remain the same. Thus, I am still used  to go to the supermarket during the week, or on the weekends, to buy everything necessary to live here. As I’m not rich (unfortunately), I’m often looking for the best bargains in Albert Heijn, Lidl, Dirk, and in drugstores too, such as Kruidvat, Etos… or wherever!

Then, I always leave there singing, satisfied for paying 'banana's price' (the Brazilians, of course!).

mona

(and ‘Lisa’ - with Portuguese meaning).

A courageous and beautiful Iranian - my “dutch” muse.

I confess I was admired at first glance. I enjoyed to know her chiefly in reason of she was not used to wear the hijab. Anything else would be unsuccessfully as so to attract me.

Her long and black hair expressed and reflected as weel all her femininity. Seeing that, I wondered myself about which motives were involved, not hidden under their kerchief anymore.

not disguised

Since I’m a leftist, I’ve been contrary of any social imposition form. Any kind of oppressiveness upsets me. With ‘gender’ it won't be different... even in another culture.

My first question to her when I knew where she was born was not about women's situation there: Did you are there during the manifestations against Ahmadinejad last year? Yes, she was in Tehran.

Not satisfied, a second: It was exactly as they have shown on television? Worse - she said, telling me more about how cruel it was. Then, we became friends.

Probably, nobody there was curious (as me) to get to know more about that.

glide dream

It’s a silly situation, but I’ve always dreamed with the day I would ice skating outdoor. Though, it hasn’t been on a natural ring yet - on some frozen canal of Amsterdam (something I will someday!).

Since I was a child, I’ve enjoyed to practically fluctuate on ice, while my thoughts go so far, quicker than my legs… Terrific! I’m loving it. Thanks Rafa, for this special night moment. 

Another magic one…

keep walking

Each day having to choose a different way to go ahead, or turning corners… It’s delicious explore new streets, cross over bridges - be it walking, riding a bike, by tram or boat... whatever! Come what may, in any case, being in Amsterdam, is a terrific experience.

One thing that inspires me while living here (mainly due to the distance from the “suburb” to downtown - more than 5km!) is discover the city, every little detail of that.  I've walked astonished at the circumstances... as if I could find my happiness everywhere!

I'm sure I could indeed! It's only a mere matter of time...

free to go wherever I want

Here, I feel myself free to walk around without any fear - even at night, with a bicycle or any expensive stuff in my possession. Not even the freezing weather dishearten me to go far outside… For me, it’s some kind of ‘fable’ the fact that in Holland they use clogs (wood shoes, somewhat heavy), which could make things worse for them. They don't, though.         

merci (or à mercê?)

Well, doesn’t matter! I prefer to do the right thing.    

I’m like that: clear, transparent - couldn’t be different. I always prefer do EVERYTHING in the best way for everyone, the fairer… Sometimes, it’s not good for me, though. I’ve been suffering the consequences of choosing this truthful way. 

I hope this time can be the opposite (It is not possible that I will NEVER be rewarded for my correct acts…!).

Sometimes I wonder myself about that... Whether I am or not in the best way - for me, not for others. I am thinking over again to be more introspective, to listening more than talk. Many simply don't deserve to know the truth. They are not thanked (and prepared) for it.