the cure

Nothing better than children's affection to heal broken hearts and/or stressed souls. 

The joy of my day (maybe the whole week) was received so much endearment from little people who are just sincer while saying they love you. 

Priceless... It's magic work with kids. 

I'm very very lucky!

spiritism

Light and truth against lost souls!
Faith, positive energy and thoughts.

greedy eye

I believe that it exists. So, I avoid that and fight off it. With all my forces. Against ill, envy, cynicism and jinx.

What's more, it's worthless try to make up intentions, playing the goody-goody, sweet well-behaved, because I am old hand. I know who I'm dealing with - although relatives don't... while feeling bad energies about.

It wont be necessary any contact (anymore). Distance is going to overrule, more and more. My faith doesn't fail.

For good... Bye. Amen.

everything comes to him who waits

How ineffable (and wonderful) is feel the mix of nervousness and anxiety with excitement while waiting for a call - a special one, of course. This happens due to the butterflies in the stomach, those which make you feel as a 'silly romantic girl' sometimes.

I confess I would like to experiment that sensation more often. Actually, not ‘only’ this, but pass through ALL process related to be involved with someone else who turns you on, and vice versa. By the way, reciprocity is essential to go ahead.

It just works when really ‘plim’! That means, first of all, it's necessary a minimum of chemical attraction, and this phenomenon is totally involuntary. So, thousands of people can call you without (at least) make your heart beat stronger… In other words: we cannot command our own feelings; the fervour of our heart does not depend on our decision.

Thus, I hope he makes by himself the right choice not to waste my precious time, energy and vocabulary with who doesn’t worth!

On the other hand, in a place where you don't have many friends, you await for simple and kind invitations in order to have some company to do something; anything... indeed! You are more opened than usually, leaving some considerable discretions aside.

In this case, it's important take care and avoid any lack or needfulness. After all, in most part of these movements, hurry and quality standards are inversely proportional. So, it's 'dangerous' while being as vulnerable as alone!

Then, all this mess in my stomach starts to arches (and also worry me) a lot...

let it shine

Unfortunately, even living in a coast city as Rio, sometimes we tend to forget this mere “detail”… Maybe because the access is so easy that it is necessary little effort to have this facility.  The major loss is the sun energy which give us vigour and a (enviable!) tan colour on the skin.

Every time this happens, I regret to waste all this grace offered for free by nature. I don’t ignore the fact that we are blessed. So, I thank God for that while diving into the sea or when taking some sun shower. After all, both are divine!

It’s also healthy - undeniable. For me, only this is already capable to cure some evils, solve things once give  enough vitality to go on. My tip is to enjoy and take it as hope for better days. As Carrie Ten Boom used to say: “Let God’s promises shine on your problems“. 

Thank you, God! À bientôt, beach.

*I will miss that... so much!

a homelife process

I used to be happy when living in an overfull house. Each one of my furniture meant a bit of my effort to make my place a comfortable one to live in.

Of course I know that a empty ambient is better to energy flows… to acquire others. However, it is necessary to give space for that!

It’s time to get in touch with things I always used to dream about… Thus, I’m trying to get rid of things to put me in a way of doing it.

One by one, I’m selling my history, everything I’ve conquered by now… Today I gave the first step for my dreams.

I sincerely would like not to have to come back, to carry back many things with me. I want to have some different from now.

I wish fill my new life, my home, with happiness, replete of useful things which will achieve me, bring me the materialization of my plans. Not material ones, though.

a proper hug

One of the best things in the world is the possibility of giving (and/or receiving) one.

Real, tight - when it is possible feel all affection while the heart’s beatings are the same. As far as I’m concerned, sometimes it is not enough only being together. In fact it's necessary to be closer, transmiting lovingness along with good vibrations.

That is it! - a friendly turn. Although a simple gesture, it means exactly everything which is important between people.

red bull effect

Involved with so many children. I've noticed that as soon as  I could imagine it would be broached the way to conduce them for freedom. Well, the liberty will happen independently  of parents and their will.

It's natural - mainly when dealing with kids from ten to twelve years old. Clearly, they are growing up... maturing. In my opinion, it is a special moment to be lived with responsibility.

"You became responsible, forever, for what you have tamed" - this Saint-Exupéry’s speech illustrates quite fine how huge is this step for infants. That is to say children acquired their own rights conscious of all duty it means.

Puberty (in this case, more than Red Bull) gives them wings. I’m pretty sure that when it is conquered day by day, with advices of mothers or fathers (or both), probably their future will be easier, with no unlooked for situations nor very unwelcome surprises which can bring some trouble along.

As far as I’m concerned everybody should give them, as homeopathy, periodical doses of independence until they become teenagers. On the contrary, problems of bad administration with freedom can show up.

So, it is up to you leave them do some activities alone in order to practicing for the real life, as a test drive of that. So, this is the best opportunity to attempt before make things wrong indeed.

In other words, this period is a blooming of those roses. Too much energy is necessary to reach and get along with them.

the cure

It’s said that all we need is love. I reckon it’s true.

Affection cures, especially when it’s with no ulterior motives. At least, it’s supposed to be free.

Looking at this point, it’s possible say that only the children are able to give that sincerely. After all, kids are all the best!

So, against any hate, all stress, hug them with your all heart. It's a shot in your arm of good vibrations... the best medicine.

Thus, your energy will be renovated. You will be as right as.

dreary season

No men as angels, super heros, Roman imperators, Grecian gods, policemen, fake Jesus, rock stars, crossdressers (as White Snow, - my favorite one!), European princes or soccer players, nor the foreign tourists (even the dutch ones) can cheer up me.

All my plans were transferred, procrastinated… I runned a lot to do everything in a correct way and, now, I simply don't know what should I do. My mind, my thoughts, my will are not here yet. I’m just waiting my soul reach me back.
 
I can't do anything against it, apart from try to keep going ahead... in spite of being difficult, almost impossible react at this moment, right now! I've suffered quietly not to be boring for the others who don‘t deserve this sorrowful energy.

Astonished (in the worst term), I simply can’t pretend to be happy celebrating a festivity that I wouldn’t like to witness it! I'm sad, still aghast at so much bad luck, crookedness… I deplore this situation and just wish leave it behind.

My life wasn’t to be like this right now, but it is, though… terrified by pirates, robbers, rogues, swindlers, scoundrels, vagrants… ops! Are there costumes for these last? Well, firstly something derived from ‘rock’, then a jew next to a martial arts pretender boy, and finally an ogre. This is a freak show! - not a reason to be joyful, glad and light-hearted, unfortunately.

March waters

It rains more than enough and everything I want is staying at home, resting quite tranquil, recharging my batteries… That this have a good cry  (in Portuguese: lavem minha alma! - necessary). 

Thus, “São as águas de março fechando o verão, é promessa de vida no meu coração”.
(a classic verses of Tom Jobim through Elis' voice that represent this moment)

When will begin the next season, PLEASE? (I'm awaiting anxious!)  

(un)known by the companies who keeps

People - difficult to know who they REALLY are… It happens: you can sleep, work and play with the enemy and simply don't know about that!

It is a dream when a "buddy" surprises us showing his good qualities, how much trustworthy and friendly he is. However, sometimes, we live a type of nightmare because we trust in who isn’t exactly who pretend to (and SHOULD) be.

Usually, they show some tips of their real personality through the expression of their eyes… When you don’t feel good energy from it, you can question yourself about this citizen. Try to believe in your intuition. In most cases it tell us the truth.

Actually, doesn’t work asking for references... (mainly if you chose not the best alternative to do that - who is just a blummer aswell!). Other people just don’t say the same truth that the look and your feelings will warning you about. To make matters worse, people lie, cheat and mislead, while another (like me) are the dupe of someone! Oh, I wish I knew... Now, It is better to laugh, so I don't cry...!

Hence, we grown up and are not so green as we were before. Live and learn… (and from our mistakes is a consequence). Nevertheless, I don’t believe that is better being a roguish than a good person. I prefer being a sensible one.     

As a rule, what goes around, comes around... Everything we do here, come back in equally force or still more intensive for us later! The evil that men do lives after them. Simple like that: You reap what you sow. Thus, safely, I feel hope for my future... Fortunately, I'm not a scoundrel, nor a stumbling rock on the no one's way (or inside their shoes)!

the bright side of everything

Sunny days - I can use only one of my hands to count them with my fingers… Even so, it is going to be left over!

Now I begin to understand the depression of North European people, who feels only few times not only the sun energy, but also the power of the its rays.

I admit that I usually try to chose the sunny walkside to go on the dutch kanaals. It’s important for me receive a little of this to get some energy, at least. Habituated with it, Brazilians (like me) miss the usual sunshowers on the beach. 

Probably, the cold mood of these people might change when is summer and the wheater is warmer... I guess.

Another curious (and tiring) matter is that the days are very short here. Only From 8 to 5pm is bright day - when the sun appears, of course. As a consequence, 3pm is already (unfortunately) the end of the afternoon!

Many business are closed (or ‘gesloten’ - as could be seen when someone tries to go somewhere after 17h) so early. It is different for us, who in Brazil are used to find many places open until 20h, or later - until the last costumer.

This is the European way of life: relaxing time after lunch, shops, drugstores and supermarkets closed at 6 pm (or five minutes before, just to guarantee no one working more than is agreed!). Fair!

ain’t an age matter

For sure NOT!

I’m Brazilian, I’m so tolerant with diferences - behavioural, cultural… whatever! It’s true that I don’t  have the patience of an oyster  with green and immature acts (of boys - specially!). However, I’m NOT an old and grumpy woman.

Despite my preferences for 40-year men, I deal with younger ones quite fine. I’m versatile, adaptable… I admit that is possible learning a lot with youth, in addition to take a ‘new energy’ shower and also re-evaluate the concepts of past. After all, I’m a open mind person, attended ("antenada"). I've always been.

By the way... Syntony(!) - I believe that this is essential for harmony in any kind of relationship (between friends, lovers, neighbours, colleagues, roommates, relatives,… doesn’t matter!). Being connected is all there is! - with or without ulterior motives.

cleaning the house up

Seven years after arriving in Rio, and this itch (proper after this run) indicates that my moment asks to ending that cycle. As a rule, many people pass through this period of difficulties - some cross it over, while other decide to change their way.

(definitely, I’ve been the second type!)

It’s a decisive time - doubtless. It’s favourable to decide what will be really valid for me in the future, everything that I want to keep belonging to me later. Then, what is not useful, is better throw it away, leave it behind.

I’m literally cleaning the house, my place, my body… everything around me mainly to release space for new energies come. It’s a “simple” matter of choise. Now or never.

supporting basis

So much emotion, many things to solve, every little detail…. At this time, some help is essential to keep my foots on the ground.

My mother, both my best friend and my fan number one, is essential at this moment. She is someone who I can not only trust but count on - always.

I'm just thanking about that because for sure I'm a very lucky daughter.

After all, it is impossible to live alone.

de assalto

É como se fosse um estupro.

Sem consentimento, essa força vem sobre mim, num pesadelo, e me domina por inteiro. Luto contra em vão, tentando acordar, libertar-me.

Não sei o que é, de onde vem, mas abusa.

Espero que essa violação não me deixe marcas.

dia das crianças

Um dia fui uma e, hoje, já penso nas minhas. Não para agora, pois tenho outras prioridades por hora... trabalho, estudos, busca por estabilidade, mudanças ainda a acontecer etc. E mais (e principalmente): primeiro, preciso achar uma pessoa que cuide de mim para, só então, arrumar alguém para eu cuidar. Elas precisam e merecem ter uma família - pai e mãe. Seja como for, uma boa base.

É um ciclo. Antes, confesso que nem gostava muito dos pequenos, porque os via como iguais. Depois, crescida, ao conviver diariamente com meu sobrinho, descobri-me uma apaixonada por este universo ingênuo, lúdico, mágico e verdadeiro. É o amor e a entrega mais forte e bonita que existe.

Troco fácil a companhia de um adulto pela de uma criança. Elas vem sempre pro bem, reenergizam-nos por inteiro com um só abraço ou nos animam com suas ‘pérolas‘ em relações racionais que fazem sem a censura que aos maduros já é inevitável.

Sofrem com esse mundo cruel que mantemos com nossas mentiras e interesses maléficos ao futuro, que a nós não pertence mais, e sim a elas. Injusto. Não as preparamos como deveríamos para enfrentar as dificuldades e protegerem-se dos que abusam e as maltratam. Espero eu, quando mãe e/ou profissional especializada, poder realmente ajudá-las a transformar este num lugar melhor, mais seguro para elas, pois é possível.

Minha mudança começa já!

A elas, dedico essa postagem e os próximos dias da minha vida.

pronto socorro

Não tenho dúvidas que abraços curam... de criança, então, tudo de bom (só energias positivas!); recarregadoras naturais da bateria interior, o coração. Melhor que isso, só colinho de mãe!  - carinho, conforto e proteção garantidos.

dourado

Gosto dele, não nego (pego quando e se puder!).

Brincadeiras à parte, até porque nunca me interessei por saradões e homens grandes (muito menos BBBs!), queria que fosse ele um dos veterenos a entrar na casa ‘mais vigiada do país’. Desde quando participou anteriormente, há seis anos, da quarta edição do reality, já tinha empatia pelo moço taurino, cabeça-dura.

Lembro que torcia para ele ficar com a 'Tonton' e, que foi uma desilusão ele ter trocado a argentina pela brasiliense Juliana – com quem acabou tendo um affair lá dentro. Fora isso, tava com ele. Adorava os arranca-rabos que ele tinha com outros participantes, inclusive a “amada”. A maioria o viu como vilão na época, mas sempre discordei.

Agora, acredito ser ele um cara que chegou para agregar, apesar de já acumular 'inimizades' e a reprovação inicial do público por seu jeitinho meio ogro, ríspido, direto, mas sincero de ser. Não tinha a popularidade da Fani ou Natália (cujas participações seriam injustas com os atuais brothers, pelo já conquistado gosto do povo), mas hoje é diferente. Parecem estar, enfim, reconhecendo seu valor.

Soubemos que o professor de educação física/artes marciais caiu nas graças da massa ao ganhar poderes supremos esta semana no programa, pela votação livre na internet. Ele pode vetar a decisão do líder, anjo, ou a decisão da casa. Muito bom! Isso prova que as pessoas estão vendo que 'os brutos também amam' (do seu jeito, claro). Nem com os coloridos, ou com a difícil Lena anda se atritando mais...

Torço por ele, não só por ser conterrâneo meu, mas por seu temperamento forte e sua postura que me agradam. Acho que, hoje, mais maduro, ele veio com tudo, pra ganhar. Essa é uma qualidade importante em jogos desse tipo. Que bom, porque 2010 é o ano do dourado – para mim, pelo menos, sim (é a arte 'imitando' a vida, mais uma vez!).

Boas energias, anti-herói! Para nós. Dourado é a cor da vitória. Olé!

luz!

Muito ouvimos durante esse ano uma coisa que agora faz muito sentido para mim: estar com as lamparinas do juízo acesas. É época de reflexão, tempo de orar, agradecer, avaliar, exteriorizar sentimentos, pensar no passado, organizar o presente e planejar o futuro.

Hoje, arrumando a casa para a entrada do ano novo, passei por aquele processo que todos deveriam fazer para mexer com as energias paradas em nosso lar: pegar alguns itens que não utilizamos mais e doá-los. Com certeza vai ser mais útil a outro alguém que juntando poeira conosco, além de liberar espaço para que o novo chegue.

Desde que me separei, sempre priorizei minha casa. Esse ano, porém, estive voltada para o trabalho. Espero que depois do carnaval possa pensar novamente em florear meu ninho, com a segurança de estar tudo bem profissionalmente – que implica na questão financeira (e até na saúde, considerando a workaholic que sou).

Apesar do envolvimento laboral, num balanço posso dizer satisfeita que 2009 foi o ano de reunião familiar. Interessante isso de, por ser hoje adulta, ter o poder de mobilizar as pessoas. E foi isso que fiz. Em pequenos (mas GRANDES) gestos, agreguei parentes que estavam distantes, oportunizei encontros...

Acho que esse foi o melhor presente de natal que eu ganhei: ter recebido mensagens dessas pessoas, dizendo o quão bom foi termos reatado laços desfeitos pelo tempo. Agradeço muito pela graça de ter podido realizar isso, da luz que tive em tomar essa iniciativa. Só ganhei dando um pouco do amor que tenho em mim.

"Família é nunca abandonar!". Desde que vi isso num desenho, nunca mais esqueci (e repito sempre). Já tentei constituir a MINHA aqui no Rio, não consegui. Em função da distância, hoje, são basicamente meus amigos. Estou me esforçando para manter e reativar o vínculo de sangue, genético, porque hoje só depende de mim. E agora, sinto que é hora de voltar a pensar em ter a minha, de verdade.

O meu desejo para 2010 na esfera pessoal é que eu tenha de novo a oportunidade de montar o meu núcleo, poder me doar a uma relação e daí gerar herdeiros no futuro. Quando estamos distante dos nossos pensamos mais nisso, sentimos falta das raízes, ficamos mais suscetíveis a essa busca. Faz parte. E estou disposta. Falta só a outra metade(,) fundamental.

Que meu caminho esteja bem iluminado! Minha mente e minha casa, pelo menos, deverão estar, prontas para quando acontecer. Vou prepará-las, investir nisso. Só quero luz nesse ano novo! - para poder fazer tudo às claras, corretamente, consciente, com sorte. As lamparinas já foram acesas...

don juan

Após recauchutagem, minha tartaruguinha volta à boa forma, cheia de energia e 'amor' pra dar. Segue agora frenética, mais ninja do que nunca.